The Difference Between Guidance and Control
They can feel similar at first.
Both guidance and control want to direct your path. Both want movement. Both want certainty — in their own way.
But one flows. The other clings.
One opens doors. The other tries to pick the lock.
If you’ve ever struggled to know whether you’re following a sacred nudge or just trying to force something, you’re not alone. Let’s break it down.
Control Says: “Make It Happen.”
Control is driven by fear. It wants to:
- Plan every step
- Avoid failure at all costs
- Protect you from discomfort, mess, or risk
- Feel in charge, even when the outcome is uncertain
Control doesn’t leave space for mystery. It needs to know.
But intuitionInner knowing or sensing that guides decision-making beyond logic or reasoning.? Intuition needs to trust.
Guidance Says: “Move With Me.”
Guidance is softer. It doesn’t push — it pulls. It might be:
- A gut feeling that doesn’t make logical sense
- A series of synchronicities
- A quiet sense of peace, even when the path is uncertain
- A message that keeps showing up no matter how many times you ignore it
Guidance respects your free will
It doesn’t scream. It invites.
How to Tell the Difference
Ask yourself:
- Do I feel tense or open right now?
- Am I trying to force a specific outcome?
- Would I feel ashamed if this didn’t work out?
- What would it feel like to let this move on its own for a while?
Control feels like urgency, tension, and “should.”
Guidance feels like alignment, ease, and “yes.”
Why Surrender Is a Skill
Surrender isn’t about giving up. It’s about releasing your grip on something that was never fully yours to hold.
It means allowing space for:
- Unexpected timing
- Alternate routes
- Your highest good (not just your current goal)
When you shift from control to guidance, you don’t lose direction — you gain support.
